Don't Judge Me!

I am still steaming over an incident that occurred this morning with the nurse of Madyson's doctor. I usually don't complain and I tend to keep my opinion of others to myself, but I certainly voiced my opinion to the doctor this morning.

I had called the doctor's office this morning to try to get Madyson on the schedule, as her cough is worse, she's wheezing more, and she had some chest retractions. Oh, and for those of you who don't know, we learned Tuesday at the doctor's office that she has bilateral ear infections. So, I left a message for the nurse at 8:30 asking that she call me at work. She called shortly after 9:00 and told me to have Madyson in the office in Butte at 10:00. I asked if I could bring her around 11:00 instead, as I work in Anaconda and I had a client from out of town on his way to my office for a 9:30 appointment. She pretty rudely told me that no, 11:00 would not work and that if I couldn't make it at 10:00 then I would have to wait until 1:45. I opted for the 1:45, as Robert was home with Madyson and I wasn't sure he could get her in by 10:00 since she was sleeping and hadn't eaten yet. Now for the part that still has me really angry...

After hanging up the phone, it started to ring. I answered the phone but didn't hear anyone at first, and then I heard the nurse.....talking about me. Apparently, she had forgotten to hang up her phone. I heard an entire conversation that she had with someone else in her office about what a terrible mother I am, that I am making my job a priority over my child, and that if I couldn't bring Madyson in at 10:00 that I should have had someone else do it. She proceeded to explain to the other person that "well, this is that baby that had the really bad RSV and now she has bilateral ear infections and the mom says she just can't bring her in because she has a client and lives in Anaconda and she just can't leave to bring her baby in." WRONGO...get your story straight about the living in Anaconda part. AND THEN I heard the person she was talking to say "oh well, at least you know where her priorities are." I quietly listened to the entire conversation, hung up, and the cried. How dare she judge me! I feel terrible enough that I work full-time and can't be with my girls all day, every day. I don't need someone else labeling me as a parent who doesn't have the best interest of her children at heart.

Being a working mother is NOT easy and my children ARE my #1 priority. However, when I have a client traveling from out of town and have no way to call the client to cancel since he's on his way to my office, it would have been very unprofessional of me to just not be at the office. As I am the only person in the office 3-4 days of the week, I didn't really have the option of having someone else explain why I wasn't present. I also wanted to be the one taking Madyson in to see her doctor this morning, as I feel like I am more aware of her behaviors, eating patterns, and the pattern her cough and breathing. But guess what? I shouldn't have to explain that to the nurse. I feel as though I was labeled as a neglectful parent who could care less about the health of her child. I worry non-stop about my children and their health, happiness, and well-being.

Once the nurse finally hung up her line, I called back and politely informed her that Madyson WOULD be in at 10:00 and that her dad would be bringing her in. I was able to leave the office by 10:00 after meeting with my client and I made it to the doctor's office right as he was finishing up with Madyson. I closed the door and explained to him my anger over hearing his nurse talking about me to someone else in the office. I explained that while I understand that working with the public can be frustrating and that scheduling appointments can be frustrating for his nurse, I do not appreciate being talked about and judged. I suggested that in the future, when his nurse has something to say about a patient or a parent, she should do so directly to him behind closed doors and not to her office-mates. I also suggested that she make sure she hangs up the phone the next time that she decided to verbally bash a parent.

Madyson's doctor was very apologetic, acknowledged that his nurse was not behaving appropriately, and said he would talk with her. I am not looking for an apology. I just want this nurse to be aware that her actions were very hurtful and that she should really stop and think before she speaks.